Identity Crisis

It’s been quite some time since I wrote anything solid. My mind has been wandering all around wondering if my writing has any purpose and serves any meaning in the first place. My heart is pounding as I pour my feelings about this one but I am going to do it anyway, because what’s the point if I don’t? Lately, there have been times where I have just sat staring at the ceiling wondering about all the things I wanted to be as a little girl and the things I want to be now (I am unsure I know). I did not know until very recently that people addressed this as “Identity Crisis”.

Uncertainty Creeps In

We are very well taught since childhood who we should be, who we are. So much so that we hardly have any time to sit with all these personalities and relate to each one of them, to have a heart to heart conversation with singular personalities. We identify ourselves in so many roles coveting so many emotions within. And, in this whole process of trying to become someone we were believed to evolve into, we lose touch with the identity that was primarily us in the first place.

One-Many or Many-one?

But, why do we have to have a crisis, especially when it comes to identities? Why cannot we assume different identities and work different roles without feeling conflicted? Isn’t that a good thing? We’re gushing over being so many things in one lifetime while we introspect on what or who our real self is. To separate our being into different personalities made no sense because Everything that we are is a result of shaping ourselves so many times, in so many different ways. I can want to be a painter today, and let go of it tomorrow if I realise that writing is what gives me peace. Does that mean I can never paint again? No. To be different, to remain the same or to show variety- you can be anything you want to be, whenever you want to be. 

The Realisation

What I realized through this process of self-reflection was how I do not have to fixate over donning just one identity. I can be so many things in one and that’s making all the difference. Figuring out who you are as a person is a priority, but to question your self-identity is disrespecting the essence of who you have grown to become as a person.

You can be so many things, and all rolled into one <3

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